“What things?”
Samuel smiled.
“Start with hair.”
Thomas took that seriously too.
PART 7
Samuel’s wife, Loretta, taught Thomas basic hair care.
Thomas was terrible.
The first braid he attempted leaned sideways like a damaged rope.
Denise looked in the mirror.
“No.”
Thomas nodded.
“Fair.”
Loretta laughed until she cried.
But Thomas kept learning.
He learned skin care.
He learned which products worked.
He learned that telling his daughters “I don’t see color” would not
prepare them for a world that often did.
Samuel told him:
“You don’t need to pretend they’re white to love them.”
Thomas answered:
“I know.”
Samuel shook his head.
“No. You’re beginning to know.”
Thomas remembered that correction for the rest of his life.
PART 8
The placement process lasted months.
Not everyone supported it.
Some people believed nine children were simply too many.
Some worried Thomas’s grief made him unstable.
Some objected because he was single.
Others objected because he was white.
One man at the hardware store said:
“You’ll regret bringing all that trouble home.”
Thomas put his purchase on the counter.
“What trouble?”
The man glanced around.
“You know.”
Thomas did know.
He left without buying anything.
Then drove fifteen miles to another store.
He never returned.
But prejudice did not disappear because Thomas refused to entertain it.
His daughters would encounter it for years.
The difference was that they would not encounter it alone.
PART 9
The court initially approved a temporary arrangement with extensive
oversight and outside support.
Thomas’s home became chaos.
Formula.
Laundry.
Diapers.
Appointments.
Crying.
More laundry.
He worked maintenance at an automotive-parts factory.
His employer adjusted some shifts after coworkers volunteered to cover
hours.
Thomas also repaired roofs and small engines for extra money.
He sold his old truck and bought a used station wagon.
Then realized it still could not carry everyone.
Samuel laughed.
“You need a bus.”
Thomas eventually bought a battered passenger van.
It was ugly.
The girls loved it.
Denise named it Bertha.
Nobody knew why.
The name stayed.
PART 10
The first year nearly broke him.
Not emotionally.
Physically.
He was exhausted.
Once he fell asleep sitting upright while holding a bottle.
Margaret arrived for an inspection and found him snoring.
She gently removed the bottle.
When Thomas woke, he panicked.
“Where’s Naomi?”
“Asleep.”
“Did I drop her?”
“No.”
He covered his face.
“I can’t do this.”
Margaret sat beside him.
“That sentence does not disqualify you.”
“It should.”
“No. People who think they can do this alone worry me more.”
That day Thomas accepted something he had resisted.
Help.
A family is not built by proving one person can carry everything.
It is built by knowing when one person should not.
PART 11
Bellwood slowly became involved.
Loretta organized a rotating meal schedule.
Samuel handled emergency repairs.
Retired teacher Evelyn Price—not related to Thomas’s late wife—helped
with early learning.
Factory coworkers donated vacation hours during medical emergencies.
A pediatrician reduced some fees.
A local seamstress altered hand-me-down clothes.
The story stopped being about one widower adopting nine girls.
It became about a community deciding whether it would make room for a
family it had never expected.
Not everyone did.
Enough did.
Eventually, after extensive proceedings and the failure of other safe
family-placement options, Thomas was allowed to move toward permanent
adoption.
He asked each older child’s caseworker the same question:
“What does she lose if she becomes a Whitaker?”
That question impressed Margaret more than anything else he said.
PART 12
Thomas understood adoption could give children family while also
involving loss.
Names.
History.
Biological connections.
Culture.
He refused to erase those things.
The girls kept records of their birth family.
Thomas maintained contact with safe relatives when possible.
Their mother’s photographs remained in the house.
When Denise asked:
“Is she still our mom?”
Thomas answered:
“Yes.”
“Then what are you?”
“Also your parent, if you’ll have me.”
Denise considered.
“You make bad pancakes.”
“I know.”
“Okay.”
That was as close to a ceremonial acceptance as Thomas received.
He treasured it.
PART 13
The adoption was finalized in stages.
See more on the next page